Attention Seekers United

There are some people out there who still adamantly refuse to use any popular social networking sites such as Facebook, but for me personally, I joined in 2007 and I love it, but for the wrong reasons!

Hey you, give me your attention right now!
Hey you, give me your attention right now!
Jeff Milsteen (Flickr)

I no longer associate Facebook with keeping in touch with people. I just wait with anticipation which levels of obnoxious bullshit will suddenly appear on my Facebook news feed?

Dysfunctional
I’ve lost count the amount of times I have seen some childish (ner ner ner ner ner) comments on Facebook which were made by people who are old enough to know better! People from various notorious dysfunctional families are usually the guilty culprits. There used to be a time when certain incidents or disagreements between family members would remain private, but those days are officially over! Now people are more than willing to give the Facebook community an exclusive insight into any family disagreements or scandals! For example, because of Facebook, I now know who constantly roams the streets unashamedly with their noticeable soiled garments while sucking on a homemade crack pipe! Basically as long as no decorum is shown, Facebook becomes distasteful, but entertaining!

Bleak Life
So go on and dish the dirt! Continue to inform the Facebook community your imitate trials, tribulations and pitfalls within your bleak life. You are not going to gain any sympathy from me, but I will gladly read your comments posted on Facebook and sometimes give my personal opinion depending on how ridiculous the comment is. See I can be compassionate when those toe curling needy situations suddenly appears on my laptop screen.

GCSE Sociology
Moving on swiftly! Straight up, most of you modern day parents are getting on my nerves! Parents are currently competing with each other which child looks the most angelic on Facebook. Prove that their kids have 10 fingers 10 toes aka successful breeding! Show that their disgusting cringeworthy tacky 1920s gangster theme black and white family portrait photos posted on Facebook should actually be placed in school children’s official GCSE Sociology textbooks. A clear example of “The successful modern day nuclear family.” Show that they are extremely proud of their accomplishments with regards to morality and also let the endless amounts of bitter single parents out there on Facebook know that “my life is better than yours ok!”

Right it’s time for me to eat my extra large meat feast pizza while I scroll through Facebook of course!

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