A small decorative tree has become quite the centre piece in the quiet town of Weldonage as of late, its odd shape has made it an attraction in this small community.
The actual type of the tree is unknown, but due to its resemblance of a sex toy it has been labelled “Buttis Pluggis”, or Butt Plug tree. It is located outside the local café, the café owner, Martha Gape, says since the appearance of the funny looking tree her business has boomed so she doesn’t mind it’s rude shape.
“I didn’t plant that thing, I’m guessing the seed fell out of a seagulls arse or something, birds always crap out the seeds they can’t digest. I’m not complaining though, I’m making a small fortune at the minute, people are travelling from all over to see the Butt Plug tree and pouring their money into my till. On Wednesdays a group of people stop by on the way to their weekly meeting, I’m guessing they’re some sort of health and safety group because they all wear protective rubber outfits and funky gas masks. They pretend to sit on the tree as they pose for photos then have sausage sandwiches“, Mrs Gape tells us.
Horace Flange, the Mayor of Weldonage, is delighted that the town is being recognized and is planning on adding other objects of interest to boost tourism and increase the towns stutus and income. Mayor Flange spoke to us about what he has in mind.
“It’s true what they say, sex sells. The Butt Plug tree is a hit so we’re going to stick with the sex theme for our towns , we’re going to pimp out our town to money spending filthy sex pests. We’re having away with the town clock and erecting a 14 foot brass cock and balls, equipped with a digital clock and free WiFi. Several vagina water features will be dotted around town too, courtesy of our very own local sculptors, Mike and Angie Lowe. Some will be nice and neatly crafted, others will be unsightly monsters for realistic variety“.
Several empty shops will be turned into souvenir shops, selling washable replicas of the Butt Plug tree and town cock, fudge and rude postcards will also be available. The townsfolk are excited about the revamp and are offering their spare rooms as accommodation and their tool sheds as readily equipped dungeons for visitors. Stay will be free with complimentary lube for swingers, providing the host can join in on their shenanigans.