by Druid's Loom Reporter | Jul 1, 2022 | News, Politics, UK
The British public, reacted with utter revulsion, yesterday, after it emerged that Boris Johnson, was caught getting his Johnson noshed off, by his then mistress Carrie Symonds. The horrifying incident occurred in Boris’ parliamentary office, whilst he was...
by Conway Hogg | Jun 24, 2022 | Lifestyle, Politics, UK
After the success of similar schemes, elsewhere in the World, a government think tank is considering reducing the Drink-Drive limit to just one pint of beer. Most normal people have looked at the catastrophic drunk-driver accident statistics and given this policy the...
by Druid's Loom Reporter | Jun 22, 2022 | News, UK
Cheap and nasty airline, Ryanair, has today decided to rename itself ‘Ryanground’, to reflect the fact that none of its aeroplanes actually fly any more. Classic Ryanair Contempt 400,000 passengers were treated with utter contempt today, as they were told...
by Druid's Loom Reporter | Jun 21, 2022 | News, UK
Staff at a Virgin Mobile call centre seem unable to expect a high volume of calls, it was revealed yesterday. For the past 120 days, lines have been jammed at the Hi-Tech facility in Birmingham, with customers being placed on hold for what feels like days. Virgin...
by Druid's Loom Reporter | Jun 20, 2022 | News, Showbiz, UK
The fictional British secret agent, James Bond, 007, has been suspended amid a number of salacious allegations dating back to 1962. Bond, James Bond GCHQ issued a statement today, explaining why the man, who has saved the world on no fewer than 24 times, will be...
by Druid's Loom Reporter | Jun 16, 2022 | News, Politics, UK
Without any surprise from the British public, Lord Geidt, the Ethic’s advisor to Boris Johnson, resigned last night. No Ethics The main reason for this is that he had nothing to do. There were no ethics to be found at number 10, whatsoever. “I was basically sat...
