Gammon Has Had a Devastating Impact on the Board Game Industry

Leading manufacturers of one of the world’s oldest board games have today announced that they are expecting huge losses over the coming financial year as retailers’ slash orders for Backgammon sets – against the fuchsia backdrop of controversy over the very nature of gammon.

The devastating impact of gammon
The devastating impact of gammon. Creative Commons Images

As retailers slash orders for the once popular game of Backgammon, games manufacturers have reacted with dismay.

Gammon vs Backgammon

In a statement issued via an industry journal, renowned games manufacturers Waddington’s publicity manager Cory Dandruff, told the Druid’s Loom.

We have manufactured Backgammon boards for over one hundred years, with great success. Indeed, it is a family favourite with a history stretching back over 5,000 years,” Mr Dandruff explained.

Toxic Gammon

However, Gammon has now become such a toxic term that recent sales and future orders of our Backgammon sets have plummeted. Considering this, we no longer wish to associate our name with the production of anything related to gammon – however tenuous the link may be,” he continued.

Jobs and dividends depend on our good standing, and we believe that our hard-earned reputation will be damaged if we do not distance our organisation from men that demonstrate gammon characteristics,” Mr Dandruff added.

Cardiovascular Disease

When we asked Mr Dandruff what in particular these characteristics he explained “Basically it is the appearance of a particularly rotund and opinionated town-crier, a rabid proponent of Brexit, and meat-like complexion.  They have an obsession with immigration, and are in a permanent state of rage over a world in which PC has apparently ‘gone mad’.

They also have the visible, physical manifestation of advanced cardiovascular disease,” he concluded.

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