Our fairground correspondent was at the scene and was able to highlight the story in full detail.
“I knew there was something funny going on when some genital skin debris landed on my candy floss. I looked over and saw this bloke engaging in a graphic sausage dissection, so I yelled, ‘hey! Isn’t that a little conspicuous and out of context in a fun park!”
Spermatic Cord
I said, “Surely clamping and ligating the right spermatic cord is a violation that contravenes fairground policy regarding sex changes of this nature. The continued incision up the ventral side of the shaft is misplaced and somewhat tasteless in my opinion. I had no prior knowledge I would be subjected to a demonstration that develops genital skin to the anterior flap.”
Perennial Dissection
I continued to remonstrate with the surgeon, ‘This sir is an imposition upon my squeamish disposition, and though this encounter may be transitory I have no desire to witness any form of body part separation that assures a fleshy stump. I wholly disapprove of your perennial dissection, as I’ve always been a firm believer that fairground rides and sex change operations cannot co-exist aesthetically or emotionally. Your perforation of the anterior flap undermines the innocent frivolity spectacle the fairground industry endeavours to convey. Suturing the skin flaps and placing them in a new position may be a medical phenomenon, but I am not enamoured by the indiscrete method you have utilized within the public arena here today.’
Discarded Testicles
I felt it was important to add, ‘An operation of this kind – performed at an extreme velocity, was always going to cause an unforeseen onslaught of discarded testicles to impale upon the forehead of a stander-by. In this case, it is in light of this, I feel I must contact the necessary authorities and report you for medical negligence’. The surgeon replied,
“Oh, you’re just prejudiced against surgeons that chop penis’ off on fairground rides.”
