MPs in Need – Druid’s Loom Charity Appeal

How would you feel if suddenly you had to pay up to 3% more Stamp Duty on your second or third home? Or, if your expense claim for your £34 breakfast was declined because you lost the receipt? This is how it feels to be an MP, everyday!

MPs In Need
Somewhere in Middle England a Moat needs cleaning. – Please Donate!

“MPs in need” is our annual fund raising appeal, for members of parliament who struggle financially on a day to day basis. Our aim is to raise money to pay for life’s essentials for these vulnerable members of society.

Prostitutes

The wage of a typical MP stands at just £67,000 a year. This is barely  enough, to pay off a prostitute and prevent them from talking to the media.

To effectively lead the country, MPs have estimated that they need at least £7902 per year on top of their measly salary.

What could the tiny sum of just £7902 do for an MP?

  • Twatsey Bear
    Twatsey Bear – The Greedy Mascot

    “I drunkenly groped my child’s Au Pair one night and now she is threatening to expose me to the papers. £7902 per year could buy me her silence.” – An MP, Essex

  • “My gardener was working illegally in the UK and I had to sack him. £7902 could pay for a properly registered UK worker.” – Another MP, Warwickshire
  • “My regular butcher wont serve me anymore, and now I have to import my ‘meat’ from Russia. £7902 will keep me in pigs heads for a year.” – D Cameron, Chipping Norton.

Your donation could really make a big difference.

 

What do I have to do to Donate?

You don’t need to do anything. £6940 will come from a backdated 10% pay increase from last year, and the remaining £962 will come from another pay rise this April.

Don’t worry though – George Osborne has announced that there will need to be further cuts in his budget this year and that austerity will need to bite further. Every little bit we save, means another MP can have a posh meal out!

Lazy public sector workers, such as teachers, doctors, nurses, firefighters and the police will  have their pay frozen, or capped at just 1% to help pay for this good cause – It is also likely that taxes for everyone will have to increase too.

It’s a small price to pay. Please give generously

MP’s In Need – It’s not like you have a fucking choice!

 

 

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Blake Hanson

I really dont agree with giving MP’s money from a charity!!

Miss Candy Whiplash

Your article about MP’s expenses completely misses the point.
If you want a good service you need to pay for it.

Yours,

Miss Candy Whiplash