The UK government has decided that the OFSTED chief inspector needs to be a bastard at an international level.
Department of Education spokesperson, Janice Blithering told The Druid’s Loom,”Current chief bastard, Sir Michael Wilshaw has done a great job in demoralising the teaching profession, driving good teachers away from the classroom and creating a teaching shortage that does not exist. Sir Michael was however a teacher and therefore, somewhere deep inside he does have the best interests of children at heart. In order to drive through our latest raft of inhumane changes to the UK education system, we need a proper lunatic bastard who practices his/her bastardry at an international level.”
7 Day a Week Service
In order to do this the Department of Education have widened their search to the far reaches of the globe. They need a bastard who is prepared to remove all school holidays, have schools working from “8 ’till Late” and to introduce a full 7 day a week educations service.
Candidates will be expected to sell what’s left of their souls, in order to create a generation of children without any free thinking and who will follow any government ideologies blindly. They also need to be able to ignore any educational study or theory and force through their ludicrous ideas without a shred of remorse.
“There just are not enough bastards in the UK. Jeremy Hunt would have been ideal, but he has his hands full destroying the NHS”, Ms Blithering concluded.
For potential applicants, can see the full job advertisement below: