Nuclear Pissing Contest More Fun With Nukes – Trump Declares

Alpha male bully and President of the United States, Donald Trump, today declared that a pissing contest is much more fun when you are in charge of the largest nuclear arsenal in the world.

Some of Trumps Nuclear Playthings - Yesterday
Some of Trumps Playthings – Yesterday
AlexAntropov86 / Pixabay

After a couple of days waving their barely ample cocks at each other, Donald Trump and Kim Jong-Un have announced that this pissing contest is about to go nuclear – literally.

Piss
I have the best piss,” explained Mr Trump. “But what’s better than piss is nuclear – am I right?

Gibberish
I also have the best nuclear. Nuclear is this stuff, you know, that can be use to make bombs and stuff,” he continued in his trademark gibberish.

Mr Trump’s response comes after a few days of goading North Korea into carrying out more nuclear tests.

Hornets Nest
Mr Trump believes that goading is absolutely the right thing to do to a country run by an utter mentalist,” explained Whitehouse spokesman Jerry Hummer. “He thinks it is really sensible to keep poking the hornets nest with a sharp stick.

We asked my Hummer if we could interview Mr Trump further, but he explained he had just settled down for his afternoon nap.

Meanwhile in North Korea, Kim Jong Un declined to comment and went out to visit an empty biscuit factory instead. Millions of innocent civilians also went about their daily lives unaware that Donald Trump was planning their demise.

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