Every year hundreds of hedgehogs are run over while crossing the road. Can you spare just £5 a month to help us buy much needed bicycle pumps?
Better still, if you have ungrateful children who hardly ever visit you and who can’t even be bothered to send you a card at Christmas – why not cut them out of your will completely? Think how pissed off they will be when you leave everything to us! By donating just £5 a month to […]
Anyone who has anything to do with children, asked today, "How has World Book Day been allowed to become an annual event?
Parents across the country reacted with horror this morning when they remembered is was bloody ‘World Book Day’. Captain Hook Mother, Judy Gwenck complained to The Druid’s Loom; “My daughter came running in this morning and told me she needed to be a character from a book. It was a nightmare. She had out grown all […]
Twitching Sphincter is a terrible medical condition that affects one in ten politicians worldwide. The main symptom is having a small mouth that resembles a twitching sphincter.
Druids Loom is determined to help raise awareness of this distressing condition because, until we find a cure, politicians will continue to talk through their arses. So please, spare a thought for people like Kim Jong Un and Hillary Clinton and give generously. Documentary Breaking news… As part of our Twitching Sphincter campaign we have […]
New guidelines from the Department of Education today suggest that the letter "E" is being overused in the English language and in future children should only use it, if the word actually begins with the letter.
Do me a favour, and this may surprise you, but if Kelvin McKenzie steps out in front of your car DON'T run him over. The life of this washed up mouthpiece, really isn't worth the damage his ample frame would cause to your vehicle.