Teachers Assume There Must be a Mistake on Their Pay-slip

Teachers opened their pay-slips today and assumed there must have been some mistake. It appeared they were not earning the £65,000, as advertised in the latest teacher recruitment advert.

Something is Amiss
Something is Amiss
hostsh / Pixabay

Teachers opened their pay-slips and immediately assumed there had been some kind of arithmetic error in the calculation of their salary. In a recent television and social network advert it was claimed that teachers can earn up to 65K after just 4 years.

Windfall Payment
There must me some mistake,” said Sandy Blockmut, an English teacher of eighteen years. “I was assuming I would be in for some kind of windfall payment, but nothing has changed. I am not even earning half of 65K and I’ve been teaching ages.

Miss Blockmut was not the only disappointed teacher. Mike Mulfunt, a science teacher of nearly thirty years, was so perplexed by the apparent shortfall in his salary that he phoned the Department of Education to check what was wrong.

Confused Teachers
An abrupt man at the end of the line, laughed at me and told me that they had been inundated by calls from confused teachers wondering why their salary was not as advertised. He then started having a conversation with someone else in the room and hung up. I don’t know what to do. I was hoping to pay off my mortgage!” he said dejectedly.

The Druid’s Loom asked the Department of Education about the apparent discrepancy between advertised pay and actual pay and a spokesperson told us, “We can say what we like in the advert. Now that every school is an academy they can pay teachers what they like from the money we give them. In theory a teacher can be paid more than 65K, but that would probably involve sacking four others.

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I reckon it’s maths teachers wot can’t count

Arthur Sixpence

I’m guessing you’re an English teacher? 🙂

Mr. D. Luded.

I easily earn the £65,000 if you take into consideration my second home (my classroom). I don’t get charged a penny for all the extra hours I spend teaching children which is an absolute bargain. Thank you Westminster. You are really looking after me.


I states quite clearly in the advert, *UP to £65k*, if this is the level of their comprehension, god help us.

Shanika Farquarre

Was only saying last week that I was going to hand in my notice at my current school and apply for a job in this ‘new’ teaching profession. Thank you David Cameron for giving me this opportunity. Forever grateful.