There were scenes of utter chaos, last night in Marsham Street, in the City of West Minster, as the area was rocked by a series of violent tremors and the Home Office totally destroyed.
Thunderbolt and Lightning
“The floor shook and the ground cracked and opening up into a gaping chasm, with all fire and brimstone and stuff. There was lighting flashing and thunder crashing all around.” exclaimed traumatized eyewitness, Fran Dingeminge.
“Within a few minutes, the Home Office, was reduced to a smouldering pile of ruins. It was like there were malevolent forces at work” she added, her face completely ashen with fear.
Godawful Screaming.
A second witness, Charlton Lump, described his experience.
“I have never seen or heard anything like it. I was utterly terrified and frozen to the spot. And the sound, oh God, the sound. There was this screaming, but like nothing I have heard before. It was the sound of pure evil, and it tore into my soul.”
“Whatever caused this was not of this world. Personally, I believe it came from hell itself,” he added, trembling uncontrollably.
Unexplained
Police have described the events as “unexplained”, and have released the following statement.
“We are currently dealing was an incident that took place in London yesterday. Unfortunately, this resulted in the almost total destruction of the Home Office building. We haven’t ruled out terrorism or natural causes as yet.”
“However, we are however looking to speak to a short, dumpy woman, with black hair and an evil smirk. She was last seen in the area screaming. “F**K Human Rights, F**K Refugees, Rwwwaaaaannnda”.
