It emerged yesterday that David Cameron, is considering a range of really posh and expensive schools to send his son. This is despite suggesting in 2009, before he was elected, that he would really like his children to go through the state education system.
Common Practice
When asked about this sudden change in opinion, a Downing Street spokesperson explained that David Cameron’s initial opinion about state schools was before the 2009 general election. “It is common practice for politicians to lie, because if they told the truth about their personal lives and intended policy, they would never get elected.”
Beaten to a Pulp
They went on to say, “Do you really expect our Prime Minister, a former Eton student, to actually send his own child to mix with children in the state education system? Let’s face it, if you sent David Cameron into a public place without his body guards he would get beaten to a pulp – imagine what they would do to his kid?”
Left in a Pub
When pressed about why he chose to send his daughter to a state school, they replied. “There are two reasons why the Prime Minster sent his daughter to a state school. The first, it was before the 2015 general election and the second, she is female, and it therefore doesn’t matter. He left her in a pub, remember!”
