Shuffle Shenanigans

Shuffle Shenanigans

Dear Editor, Last week I was making the five-hour drive from Southampton to Manchester, with my lovely wife. To pass the time, we decided to listen to a selection of audiobooks on my car’s new fangled mp3 player. Both myself and my wife really struggled to...
Clap for NHS

Clap for NHS

Dear Druid, I was disgusted to learn today that there is an online campaign, running on Facebook and Twitter, to give our NHS heroes The Clap. Haven’t they got enough to contend with, with the current Coronavirus crisis, without being infected by painful,...
Drone-avirus

Drone-avirus

Dear Mr Druid, May I remind people they should be standing at least 2 miles apart at all times. Anyone found walking on moorland or mountains with a gap of less than 2 miles between them will be shot on site by a police drone. Unless you’re an aristocrat,...
The Blitz Spirit

The Blitz Spirit

Dear Druid, As a former Health Minister who shed 50,000 nurse places from the NHS, I appeal to the Druids Loom community to remember the example set by our grandparents and soldier on in the heroic wartime Blitz spirit. My own granddad was in the Luftwaffe. Thanks in...
Drugs Awareness

Drugs Awareness

Dear Editor, I don’t know what all this fuss is about with athletes taking drugs before they do their running races and stuff. Surely it’s much harder to do this whilst on drugs. During my dark years at uni, when I spent most of my life ripped to the tits...