by Stephen Druce | Feb 15, 2017 | News, UK
Our fairground correspondent was at the scene and was able to highlight the story in full detail. “I knew there was something funny going on when some genital skin debris landed on my candy floss. I looked over and saw this bloke engaging in a graphic sausage...
by Druid's Loom Reporter | Feb 26, 2016 | Education, News, UK
The UK government has decided that the OFSTED chief inspector needs to be a bastard at an international level. Lunatic Department of Education spokesperson, Janice Blithering told The Druid’s Loom, “Current chief bastard, Sir Michael Wilshaw has done a great job...
by Stephen Druce | Feb 25, 2016 | News, UK
Rob Sidebottom 36, applied this method of attack as a strategy to mitigate his violations in a hypothetical court case. He figured that a slapstick approach to street robbery would provide some amusement for the judge, who may subsequently demonstrate some leniency...
by Stephen Druce | Feb 20, 2016 | News, Sport, UK
I caught her red-handed – jogging with her head positioned lower than her ass. An utterly unforgivable act – worse than adultery in my book! Humiliation I would rather have caught her doing that than jogging with her head positioned lower than her ass. It’s the...
by David Swyneprodder | Feb 18, 2016 | International, News
In war zones across the world, child soldiers are forced to carry heavy weapons that are designed for adults. These cause them chronic back pain, headaches and serious joint problems. Thanks to lobbying by The Druid’s Loom, the British arms industry will soon be...
by David Swyneprodder | Feb 17, 2016 | News, Politics
The new Bill gives provision for the police to detain and imprison anyone who uses body language in a threatening or antisocial manner, or in a way that is likely to promote terrorism. Tut-Tut Using robust legal research methodology, The Druid’s Loom has been...