by Druid's Loom Reporter | Jun 15, 2022 | News, Politics, UK
There were scenes of utter chaos, last night in Marsham Street, in the City of West Minster, as the area was rocked by a series of violent tremors and the Home Office totally destroyed. Thunderbolt and Lightning “The floor shook and the ground cracked and opening up...
by Druid's Loom Reporter | Jun 12, 2022 | News, Politics, UK
It has taken a long time to secure an afternoon with Priti Patel. As she glided into the room, the temperature noticeably fell. The short, dumpy Home Secretary, complete with her trademark smirk, drifted eerily to a small leather armchair, and settled down. “You may...
by Lee Hartley | Nov 16, 2021 | News, UK
A man today shared his disgust at the idea of men having sexual relations with women. He stated that they were “All at it, these Heterosexuals.” and in a insensitive move he stated that they should ban “straight marriage”. Stiffly Steve Trent...
by Druid's Loom Reporter | Mar 25, 2020 | Business, News, UK
Whilst the country languishes in lockdown, and heroic front line NHS staff struggle in the fight against Coronavirus, British banks prove (if any further proof were needed) that they are total and utter f**king bastards. Sick, Vulnerable and Desperate In a totally...
by Stephen Druce | Feb 15, 2017 | News, UK
Our fairground correspondent was at the scene and was able to highlight the story in full detail. “I knew there was something funny going on when some genital skin debris landed on my candy floss. I looked over and saw this bloke engaging in a graphic sausage...
by Druid's Loom Reporter | Feb 26, 2016 | Education, News, UK
The UK government has decided that the OFSTED chief inspector needs to be a bastard at an international level. Lunatic Department of Education spokesperson, Janice Blithering told The Druid’s Loom, “Current chief bastard, Sir Michael Wilshaw has done a great job...